How We Are In A Relationship Tells Us Who We Are in The Moment
Do you ever project what is going on inside of you onto to someone else? Do you ever find yourself being unkind to someone and then afterwards asking, “What was that all about?” Do you notice how different aspects of who you are show up in different relationships?
Today we’re exploring how who we are in the moment shows up in our relationships—in our connections with those around us and how by being mindful and investigating what arises allows us to change behaviors, feeling, and attitudes that don’t serve us and to cultivate those that do.
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When we are in our relationship with others that we act out both our helpful and hurtful aspects of ourselves—those that serve us and those that don’t. How we are in relationship tells us who we are in that moment.
Today we explore many of the ways that we project who we are in the moment onto others and how others project who they are onto us. We talk about how to act skillfully whether we are giving or receiving.
In relationship, we find our kindness, compassion, generosity, and wisdom. These qualities are not abstractions or nice to think about, they require our direct experience with others to realize their benefits of calm, peace, freedom, and clarity, and courage.
When we are these aspects of ourselves, we open ourselves to the good. When we let the good permeate every aspect of ourselves, we change who we are.
In relationship, we also find ourselves acting out the habits and patterns that cause us suffering—that bring us feelings of dissatisfaction, pain, regret, and stuckness and makes us feel heavy, inert, and unable to move. We may feel trapped, needy, sad, or agitated.
In these moments, we may believe it is the other that is the cause of all this when it is actually us. When we wake up to what's happening right now honestly, we see it is us--not the other person. We talk about the skillful practices of equanimity, intention, and impact. And, we see how being compassionate with ourselves and others breaks through everything.
This week I invite you to be mindful in your interactions with others. What aspects of yourself are showing up? What dissatisfaction is showing up? Hold up a mirror and you’ll see yourself just as you are—your discontent as well as your contentment. Use the reflection to skillfully investigate with curiosity and friendliness what’s not serving you and bringing your generosity, let it go.
Enjoy the show. I so appreciate you and also appreciate the people behind the scenes who make this podcast possible.
Gorgias Romero for original music, audio engineering and production;
Bill Rafferty for technical web support;
Allie Allen for logo and podcast cover design; and
Margaret Haas for announcing the show
Be well. Be mindful.
DISCLAIMER
The content in the podcast and on this webpage is for educational purposes only. It is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical or health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice and guidance of your health professional.
