The Two Wolves
Have you ever been surprised when hatred has reared its head in you in the heat of the moment? When it arises how do you care for it? Have you ever been on the receiving end of hate? How did you respond?
Today our topic is hatred, how it poisons us, how mindfulness can free us from its clutches, and how we can apply compassion in its stead.
Hatred abounds in the world today. Perhaps there always has been as much; and maybe it is only because of the constant stream of world news that crosses in front of us on our screens that we feel there is more. Hatred is not just out there though. The capacity to hate is also inside each of us.
Some important points about hatred:
Hatred forms from being attacked and then feeling unworthy, afraid, or shamed. There is always some situation underneath the hatred that drives it. To resolve hatred get to the situation and the feelings around it.
We can be conditioned to hate. Repeatedly taught over time to hate others, we will hate. We can, however, unlearn or decondition ourselves from these beliefs.
When we hate, the hate first burns us inwardly and then it burns another outwardly. We never escape unscathed from hate.
There is another way. We can be mindful of our hate; enquire into the whole situation so that we can unwind the string of cause and effect underneath it. Be compassionate: First to ourselves, by taking care of our hatred—by being mindful and by enquiring to get to its root causes. And, then by being compassionate to others and by being kind and loving.
It is important to note that when we become mindful of difficult and complex emotions such as hatred, it may feel like it is too much and we may get ungrounded. If this happens. Stop. Bring your awareness into your feet. Feel the feet from the inside—notice the sensations arising and name them—and notice the connection of your feet to mother earth. Open your eyes and look around the room, naming aloud five things that you see around you. Get up and take a walk. Talk immediately to your health care professional.
CREDITS/RESOURCES
In the show I tell two small stories. The story of the hot ember has been attributed to the Buddha or Buddhaghosa a fifth century Theravada Buddhism commentator and scholar. Its source is unclear. The story of the grandfather and the boy, sometimes called, “The Two Wolves,” is an ancient native American story. It may be Cherokee but that is not definitive.
Thich Nhat Hanh, No Mud, No Lotus: The Art of Transforming Suffering, Parallax Press, 2014, p. 11, Kindle Edition.
If you feel unsafe in a relationship or are in an abusive relationship, reach out for help. In the United States, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline (USA) 800-799-7233 or text START to 88788 for help.
MY GRATITUDE:
I am grateful to you, my listeners. I hope you find today’s show helpful and I hope that you’ll download the episode, share it with your friends, and please review it on Apple podcasts.
Thanks to everyone behind the scenes, without whom this podcast would not be possible.
Gorgias Romero for original music, audio engineering and production;
Bill Rafferty for technical web support;
Allie Allen for logo and podcast cover design; and
Margaret Haas for announcing the show
DISCLAIMER
The content in the podcast and on this webpage is for educational purposes only. It is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical or health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice and guidance of your health professional.
