Feeling Tone—What Happens Before Emotion and Story

How is it for you? Does experience seem to rush in and over you, leaving you in constant reactive mode? Do you find yourself reacting and then wondering what was that all about?  Do you sometimes feel uneasy or uncomfortable without knowing why?

It is a startling truth that each time we come into contact with something through sight, sound, smell, touch, taste or thought a feeling tone registers. And, feeling tone has only three flavors: Pleasant, unpleasant, and neither pleasant nor unpleasant (neither/nor). That’s it.

It’s also interesting that feeling tone precedes emotion and thought. In English we use the word feeling to describe emotional state; in this instance, we use feeling tone to describe the quality of valence that arises before emotion. The person pontificating about their rights may arouse an unpleasant feeling tone. Paying attention, I can notice, and then just let the unpleasantness be there without doing anything—without thinking that the person is a jerk or without throwing a nasty verbal barb back at the person. Notice how this pause allows me to consider what a wise action might be. It might lead me to consider the suffering of the pontificating individual and I then would send wishes of compassion to the the person. 

May you be free from suffering.

May you live with ease.

May you be full of joy and peace.

Feeling tone arises before we have constructed a story around our contact with experience. Many of the stories that we construct are self-absorbed—are about injustices and misunderstandings—how we’re better than or worse than everyone else. Or they are about our opinions and beliefs about ourselves and others. When we’re in the middle of a story running around in our head, we might discover that it actually doesn’t feel very good and is not satisfying. Being with the feeling tone—whichever it is—gives us the opportunity to just be with it without creating a story around it. And, then we notice something really interesting, the feeling tone is gone as is the energy around that moment of experience. 

Feeling tone arises the moment we come into contact with something through the senses of sight, sound, touch, smell, taste, and thought. Yes, in the context of mindfulness, thought is a sense. We sense thoughts just as we sense smells, sounds, tastes, sights or touch. Whenever we come into contact with a thought—we’re aware of it— and a feeling tone arises. When you are sitting in meditation, take some time to just be with thoughts arising and passing by. What you’ll notice is that thoughts suddenly appear and you sense them as they come into your consciousness.

Feeling tone is not implicit in the thing with which we come into contact; it is in us; and it is always changing given the context of experience. Eating a spoon of ice cream can be pleasant or unpleasant depending on the context. If the context is: It’s my first spoonful, then it probably is pleasant. If the context is that it is my twentieth spoonful and my stomach is full, then it most likely is unpleasant. Just as beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so is feeling tone.

Feeling tone is a kind of early warning system that alerts us to pay attention to right now. It magnificently and simply parses the valence of what’s happening now into three qualities. And, it liberates us, giving us the opportunity to pause and choose what happens next. Rather than react impulsively and habitually, we can choose an appropriate response taking in the contact with experience, the context of the experience, and the feeling tone of the contact with experience. Paying attention to feeling tone, we gain the wisdom that simply allowing the feeling tone to be with us and not doing anything about it is wise.

I invite you to first just know the feeling tone of each moment—pleasant, unpleasant, or neither/not

Then to be aware of how you react—that kind of instantaneous reaction of not liking it like and pushing it away or liking it and wanting more of it or becoming indifferent or bored and in so doing turning away.  Rather than react, just let it be—whatever it is. If it is pleasant let it be there; if it is unpleasant just let it be there; if it is neither/nor just let it be there. 

Keep it simple.  Be curious.

Bring this practice of feeling tone into your meditation practice. Just sit with the eyes gently closed or the gazed softened lowered. 

Settling into the body, and now aware of the breath.

Following the breath. Noticing the feeling tone of the breath in the nostrils and the feeling tone of the chest or abdomen rising and falling. 

Whatever the feeling tone is pleasant, unpleasant, or neither pleasant nor unpleasant, simply allow it to be there until it is not there any more.

Now opening your awareness to include any sounds that arise and also noticing the feeling tone of each sound that arises

Allowing the feeling tone to simply be there without the need to do anything about it.

Now opening your awareness to include thoughts that arise and also noticing the feeling tone of each thought without getting into the story or meaning of the thought—just registering the feeling tone of pleasant, unpleasant or neither/nor. 

Sitting now with your awareness open to the arising sensations of the breath, sounds, and thoughts and noticing the feeling tone of each one as it arises. Just noticing and if it is helpful making a very soft mental note pleasant, unpleasant, or neither/nor.

If you are just starting out sit with this practice for fa few minutes at a time and then as you practice, lengthen the amount of time. That’s all for today.

I hope you enjoy the show.  I invite you to listen, subscribe, and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts or Spotify or wherever you listen.

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As always I am grateful for you, my listeners, for your curiosity, openness, and spirit of discovery.  And, I am grateful for the people behind the scenes that make this podcast possible.

Allie Allen in San Francisco, California for logo and podcast cover design;
Gorgias Romero in Santiago, Chile for original music, audio engineering, and production;
Bill Rafferty in Sydney, Australia for technical web support, and
Margaret Haas in Los Angeles, California for announcing the show.

May you enjoy exploring the feeling tone of each moment of experience.

Be well. Be mindful.

DISCLAIMER: The content in the podcast and on this webpage is for educational purposes only. It is not intended to constitute or be a substitute for professional medical or health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the guidance and advice of your health professional.